Saturday, February 12, 2011
40 Weeks 3 Days
i finally have timeee!! I actually always have...just I finally thought about blogging. So I am two days over my estimated due date. Too cozy in there for her maybe? My feelings...? nervous, anxious, scared, impatient, crazy, scared and scared and more scared. i am at 40 weeks and 3 days? b&i finally re-put jamie's crib together so that it's higher and put decorations around it :) i shall take a picture sooon!! everyone's expectingggg herrrrrr yet she doesn't want to greet the world yet. my parents ask me everydayyy!! anyway, b&i are running out of things to do :/ ... he got his car tow today too >:[ stupid mean neighbors of mine. anyway... on the good side, we got little lucca's sandwich for the first time today!! it was...yummy in our tummmmmyyy!!!! it was huge too. so worth the money! after i ate half of the sandwich, i had major food coma that put me to sleep for two hours while honey washed my car :D im hungeee...time to look for late night snackkkkkk. hopefully the next time i blog, jamie will be here (=
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Saturday, December 4, 2010
What's best for us is what's hardest to do.
Things you can't recover in life:
1) The stone after it's thrown.
2) The word after it's said.
3) The moment after it's missed.
4) The time after it's gone.
1) The stone after it's thrown.
2) The word after it's said.
3) The moment after it's missed.
4) The time after it's gone.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
30 Weeks 3 Days
Physically, I feel like a planet. Other than that, I feel like I'm prone to being more emotional. My feelings are so fragile for some reason. If it hurts my feelings even if it's a really little thing...next thing to you know, I'm tearing to myself. It's out of the ordinary. It's finally December...alot of things to look forward this month. School is ending in two weeks. Winterbreak.. baby shower anniversary...the holiday season and all that good stuff (= it's going to be a busy month also. but hopefully everything will work out as we move along. It's going to be a big headache thinking about gifts. It's hard because everyones been so caught up in their own lives. It's hard to know what everyone wants/needs anymore. In the end, I guess it's the thought that counts? I will definitely be sending out Christmas cards! I'm going to keep it short. Happy holidays.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
i'm feeling really unappreciated.
"Lately our house is not a home
You come in, take a shower and then say I'm gone.
What am I to do
When my heart says leave
But my feet won't move
And today is our anniversary
And you haven't even said two words to me"
What a horrible night. this suffocated feeling isn't easing at all..it's two a.m.. I finally realized what others have told me was true. I was too excited to start my own family to remember the struggles that came along with it. I no longer have the freedom I used to have. When it comes to my own relationship, i can no longer say/do what I used to do because I can't think for myself anymore. No more 'im gone-' and next thing, 'hey i'm back. wanna talk?' kind of thing. you're going to be with this person, forever. why? because you made the biggest decision of your life at the age of eighteen to bear a child for him. I can't say I'm starting to regret but...on second thought, I'm contemplating whether this is how I want it to be anymore.. sometimes, I just feel like nobody deserves to be treated this way. they say during your pregnancy stage of your life, you glow and you're at the highest peek of your life then why do I feel so much heavy feeling in my chest half the time? ... It's suffocating so badly that literally makes me unable catch my breath and eventually, I burst into tears. I have so much fustration that I don't even remember how to express them. Don't really know how much I can take longer. another sleepless night.
You come in, take a shower and then say I'm gone.
What am I to do
When my heart says leave
But my feet won't move
And today is our anniversary
And you haven't even said two words to me"
What a horrible night. this suffocated feeling isn't easing at all..it's two a.m.. I finally realized what others have told me was true. I was too excited to start my own family to remember the struggles that came along with it. I no longer have the freedom I used to have. When it comes to my own relationship, i can no longer say/do what I used to do because I can't think for myself anymore. No more 'im gone-' and next thing, 'hey i'm back. wanna talk?' kind of thing. you're going to be with this person, forever. why? because you made the biggest decision of your life at the age of eighteen to bear a child for him. I can't say I'm starting to regret but...on second thought, I'm contemplating whether this is how I want it to be anymore.. sometimes, I just feel like nobody deserves to be treated this way. they say during your pregnancy stage of your life, you glow and you're at the highest peek of your life then why do I feel so much heavy feeling in my chest half the time? ... It's suffocating so badly that literally makes me unable catch my breath and eventually, I burst into tears. I have so much fustration that I don't even remember how to express them. Don't really know how much I can take longer. another sleepless night.
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